Tuesday, January 7, 2014

There Are Things That Are A Part Of Us That May Not Have Been If We Were Never Abused. Accepting Ourselves And Coping With These Are Very Important

There Are Things That Are A Part Of Us That May Not Have Been If We Were Never Abused.  Accepting Ourselves And Coping With These Are Very Important

There are many things that people deal with as a result of abuse.   They may include one or more of the following:  PTSD, depression,  sadomasochism,  anxiety,  OCD, and many other things.   Some things can be changed over time.

   We may find ourselves dealing less with depression and anxiety as we are able to help others who have been through what we have and trusting in God to heal us.  We may also find that PTSD will not change.   We may see someone else being abused and in my case, I would have uncontrollable shaking and would be unable to speak especially if the abuse is the same type I have faced.   Sadomasochism or my desires to get spanked will never change which has been triggered by a severe spanking I took as a child.  

We may not have had some of these things in our lives if we have never been abused.   Some of these things we will have to accept that they will not change.   We have to learn to accept them as a part of us and not be ashamed of it.  Being ashamed of it will only cause us more harm and increase anxiety.  

God may have allowed these things to be a part of us because He has a purpose for that.   I can testify that had I not had spanking desires,  I would have been more judgmental of people.   I would have been legalistic.   I would not have trusted the Bible for my values,  but instead I would have trusted what people considered "normal".  I would have also judged people's differences rather than accept them.  Trust me, I have plead with God to take that away from me but He had better plans and as a result He made me a better person.

Had I not had PTSD, I would not have taken abuse seriously and would have blown it off like a lot of people do.   I would not have cared.  I would never have learn how to cope with it.  PTSD never disappears, but with time and trust in God,  we can learn to cope with it.   Flashbacks is a part of PTSD.   God has helped me by showing me how people's lives were blessed because of what I went through.  God showed me how to think about the lives saved from suicide because of what I went through when I encounter flashbacks.   God showed me how to cope with flashbacks so I can show others. 

Through all this,  God has taught me to accept myself and all parts of me.  God forgives the sin and He helps us to repent and change from our sins.   God has also taught me to accept every part of me that is not sinful.   God has also taught me to accept other people and their differences as well.  (If a person has sin issues, we ought to gently restore them with love and show them their sin.  If those differences are not sin issues, we as Christians ought to openly accept them.) 

I can now say that I am blessed by having gone through the things I have.   I can now say that I am blessed because of the things I deal with as a result of the abuse I went through.  All these things have taught me to accept myself and others with differences and all.  I am blessed because of that.    If you trust God,  you will also be blessed.   I will pray for every one of you. 

Rodney Calmes

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