"Bad Cops"

"Bad Cops"

"Bad cops" are referred to parents,  teachers, other forms of caretakers, bosses, or other forms of authorities who knit pick people.  

Having a bad cop does not benefit anyone, it does not promote behavior or performance.  It does the opposite.   Bad cops find little things that people do and punish them for it.   They expect people to read their minds and expect people to act according to what they think.   Every little thing that deviates from that,  a person gets punished. 

People under bad cops whether they are children or adults become discouraged.  They get punished and don't understand why.  It gets to a point where I am going to be punished anyway so I might as well do what I want.   We walk on egg shells when we are around these bad cops.  Their behavior destroys our confidence.   Their behavior makes us feel worthless.   Because we are walking on egg shells and we live in fear,  our performance drops in the event of a job situation.   We become fearful of our parents/caretakers and are afraid to even talk to them because of fear of making them mad or getting in their way.   We become fearful of asking teachers questions in fear of being punished for not getting it, thus our grades drop. 

The punishment we get from bad cops become ineffective because we have no escape from punishment.  We feel that we are going to get punished no matter what.   We feel that there is nothing we can do to avoid punishment.   We become resentful of these "bad cops". 

For those who were raised with "bad cops", it may be difficult at best to regain confidence.  For those who had "bad cops" for a boss, as soon as we move on to a better job environment,  our confidence comes back rather shortly.  We may also fear finding another job in fear that we would not make it.   For those who had "bad cops" for teachers,  we may lose confidence in school or academics and avoid schooling.  

We all run into "bad cops" somewhere down the line.  If you are struggling with this,  I will pray for you.

Always know that if we strive to please God rather than men,  God is well pleased with that.  

Rodney Calmes