Families Will Deny Our Abuse Leaving Us Alienated And Alone

Families Will Deny Our Abuse Leaving Us Alienated And Alone When we have been abused by our families, they will deny the abuse or tone it down. When we bring up the things that we remember, they will try to convince us that our memories are inaccurate or invalidate our memories and make us feel that we are nuts. They will accuse us of lying and making it up. When we tell our friends about our abuse and they find out, they will convince our friends that we are lying and our friends will no longer listen to us. When we talk about it in the church, they will convince the church that we are lying and can lead some to get kicked out. Others will not be heard. They will appear to be good people on the outside and they may be well liked. People will tend to believe them and not believe us. This ends up leaving us alienated and alone. I have personally experienced this with my family. I had to block them from my Facebook and open another facebook account with just family because of that. They also came to some people in my church as well and tried to invalidate me there also. God knows what they have done and of their pride, self-righteousness, and arrogance which if they don't repent and change their ways, they will find themselves in hell. God knows what you have been through and He understands your struggles. What they have done to you, they have done to God also. Rodney Calmes Sent from Catch Notes for Android https://catch.com

Talking To Yourself Can Help You Think More Clearly

Talking To Yourself Can Help You Think More Clearly Many people do not understand when others talk to themselves. It is something I do regularly. I have no imaginary friends. I am fully coherent and aware of my surroundings when I do it. Sometimes I spew out numbers, thoughts, or what I am planning to say to a person most of the time in a whisper or soft voice. It may not seem normal but I think a lot more clearly when I do that. Sometimes talking out my thoughts when I am alone can help me sort my thoughts and feelings. It can be more healthy, but many are judged as being nuts or they are made fun of because of that. Some people will judge me or others like me as having imaginary friends, which is not true. I now work in a shop full of people who talk out their thoughts to themselves and working by them, I can hear their next thought about what they are going to do next. I have been like that since childhood and working with those guys have helped me to know that I am not alone. This is nothing to be ashamed of. That is a part of me. Any differences you have, you have nothing to be ashamed of. We are all unique and beautiful. Rodney Calmes Sent from Catch Notes for Android https://catch.com

An Example Of Hebrews 9:22 "No Remission Of Sin Without The Shedding Of Blood" Being Practiced Incorrectly.

An Example Of Hebrews 9:22 "No Remission Of Sin Without The Shedding Of Blood" Being Practiced Incorrectly. There was a man who had many children and he had some grandchildren living with him temporarily. He would spank his children and grandchildren until their butts bled for every little thing with the purpose of making remission for their sins. He would take them down stairs with his other children male and female to watch the kid getting spanked on their bare butt until it bled. The sounds of the stick hitting that bare skin was so loud that it could be heard loudly upstairs if you were not in the basement at that time. One day, on a Sunday after confession the kids were upstairs and that man went downstairs alone and you could hear the same noises that a stick hitting bare skin would make and just as loud, but this time there were no kids screaming and no one else down there. One of the kids heard the noise and asked his dad what he was doing and the dad responded "there is no remission for sin except for the shedding of blood" as the man was walking with only very short steps afterward and would avoid sitting as much as possible. This was something that I did not personally witness but heard about from trustworthy people. I will not share any names or give any hints about who it is. The key thing that was forgotten was that in the whole chapters 9 and 10 of Hebrews, Jesus shed His blood on a cross for all sin for all time. There is no more sacrifice needed for sin. Jesus is the only One who can make remission for sin and He only had to die once and then rose from the dead and all sin is paid for.

Rodney Calmes

BDSM Comes With No Shame

BDSM Comes With No Shame The unique thing I like about BDSM is that I can practice it with no shame. I am a Christian and because the Bible does not address BDSM, I can practice it with no guilt. There is nothing better than to be able to embrace what I like with no shame or guilt. I don't have to be ashamed of the scars on my butt from getting whipped. No one can condemn me for that. I have struggled with being ashamed of what I liked for many years to find out that there is nothing to be ashamed of. Those who are not into BDSM does not have to be. Each person has a choice to practice what they like without being ashamed of it as long as it is legal, does not go against the will of the spouse and the Bible does not call it a sin. We are all different and we have a right to be different and to be ourselves without shame or ridicule. Rodney Calmes Sent from Catch Notes for Android https://catch.com

Trying To Stop The Physical Act Of Harming Ourselves Is Not The Solution

Trying To Stop The Physical Act Of Harming Ourselves Is Not The Solution. We find ourselves cutting, hitting, burning, or doing other harmful things to ourselves. We try to get rid of the things we use to harm ourselves with. We try substitutes, like ice or things that do no harm but produces pain. We try preoccupying ourselves so that we don't have time to harm ourselves. We did not fix our problem. We have deep emotional pain inside that we never dealt with. We tr to run from it. Dealing with it may be the hardest thing we can do. We must deal with it and give it to God. We must accept Jesus Christ as our Lord and Savior and repent of any known sin. This is our true solution and our true fix. We must fix what is inside before we can fix what is outside. Rodney Calmes Sent from Catch Notes for Android https://catch.com

The Difference Of A Person Who Has A Photographic Memory

The Difference Of A Person Who Has A Photographic Memory

I have a photographic memory. In a lot of ways it has been a great advantage. I retain information well. I did not have to do a lot of studying for tests. I did not have to take a lot of notes.

I can remember events that happened a long time ago in great detail. Each memory is like a movie that plays inside of my head. I can remember numbers well. I was told to remember a model number on a Honda 50 motor cycle so that me and a friend could get a part for it. Once it is in my memory, It will never leave. I was in high school at the time in 1989. I still remember that number to this day. It was "C110-203872". I can remember phone numbers that people had when I was a kid.

I have read and studied the Bible and I retain a lot of that well. I also watch a lot of nature documentaries and I retain information very well. I was in Haiti for a mission trip and I was called "the walking and talking encyclopedia".

There are disadvantages to having a photographic memory. Every time a memory gets triggered, I will not only remember the event, but I will feel what I felt when it happened. That makes it very difficult to forgive, but God gave me the strength to forgive a lot of the terrible things I went through. The triggers do not necessarily have to be bad events, but can be good events too. I doesn't matter if it happened yesterday or 30 or more years ago. If it is a sad event, I will feel sad. If it is a funny event, I will break out in a laughter. It could be a scene in a movie that caused me to be sad or that caused me to laugh. I recently broke out laughing about a scene in a movie that I saw 15 years ago.

Most people are not like that and most people's memories are not that extremely sharp. If I had to tell someone that I was laughing about the movie scene that happened 15 years ago, they would think I was nuts.

Most of the time these triggers usually occur during idle times. Keeping myself preoccupied greatly reduces these triggers.

Most people would have triggers and flashbacks of their very traumatic experiences. People like me and possibly others with photographic memories would have triggers and flashbacks on every event big or small. We cannot prevent them from happening, but only reduce their chances of happening by keeping busy.

When these triggers happen, I am fully aware of my surroundings and fully coherent as to what is going on.

People with photographic memories my seem different or may act different. I hope that by sharing this that we can have a better understanding of the differences of others and be more accepting of others rather than having negative thoughts about them or assuming that they are nuts.

Everyone is different. If we learn to accept those who are different, we can learn a lot from one another.

Rodney Calmes

Don't Be Ashamed Of Who You Are

Don't Be Ashamed Of Who You Are. Do you have characteristics about yourself that may not be common? Were bullied because of it? Do You feel that you are the only one? Are you afraid of what people would think if they found out about that characteristic? I have been down that road many times. I have desired to get spanked since I was 8. I often spanked myself and was afraid of what would happen if someone seen me doing that. I was ashamed of that. I often thought "what if the neighbors heard my spanking myself?". I often thought that people would think less of me if they found out that I liked getting spanked. I kept that secret for a long time. I asked God to take that away from me. No matter what I did, I could not change that about me. I struggled with that for a long time. God never took that from me. I searched the Bible and I could not find anything about that in the Bible. I thought that I was in sin. I found nothing that called it a sin. Anything done between husband and wife with consent is ok, including spankings. 2 years ago, someone took a picture of me changing clothes and posted that picture on the internet revealing the scars on my butt from a whipping that I consented to. He took me by surprise. I tried to hide that. He exposed that to all my Facebook friends. That forced me to reveal that. It was a difficult time in my life. I found out that no one thought any less of me and many stood by my side. No one treated me any different. I was blessed because even though a part of me that I was ashamed of got revealed that no one thought any less of me. I am no longer ashamed of that and now I freely talk about it. I no longer have to carry any secrets. I have never hurt anyone by what I do. I have never done anything against the consent of another person. Even though what that person did to me was ugly, that whole thing has set me free. I no longer have to be ashamed of who I am or what I like. Another thing I was ashamed of was that I am a very sensitive person. I cry very easily especially when I see someone who is sad. I have been ashamed of that for years also. I tried to hide myself when I got sensitive. I have learned that there is nothing wrong with being myself. As long as the Bible does not call it a sin, it is ok to embrace in it. I learned not to judge others or call anything a sin that the Bible does not call a sin. This is why God never delivered me from my desires to get spanked. I have also learned that God created my emotions. I have nothing to be ashamed of because of my sensitivity. My sensitivity has caused me to love people and show kindness toward them. It caused me to care about people and pray for them. It has caused me to help others any time I can and to be there for them. You may have things about yourself that are different. Don't be ashamed of them. As long as the Bible does not call it a sin and you are not hurting others, embrace it, don't be ashamed of it. People will love you for who you are. Those who cannot love you for who you are don't deserve to have someone like you. You don't have to try to hide who you are. You are the person God created you to be. Be yourself, it is ok. There is nothing to be ashamed of. Rodney Calmes Sent from Catch Notes for Android https://catch.com

Everyone Has Differences

Every person has things about themselves that are different. People are often judged and ridiculed for their differences. Some of these differences are because that is the way God created them. Example: God made me a sensitive person who cries easily especially when I see someone who is sad. There may not be any environmental things that caused that. God created me that way. Some differences come from things that happened. You may go into a locker room and see scars on someone's butt that resulted from being whipped. The person may be old enough that it is obvious that those scars did not come from childhood abuse. You may conclude that the person is into sadomasochism. People scoff at him and make fun of him because of that. They may make judgments on him. That person who has been whipped consented to it. I have been that person. I was spanked severely as a child and when a person takes a severe spanking with blunt force, it triggers involuntary sexual experiences that causes a person to desire spankings and whippings. This is a physical thing, not just psychological. I started to desire spankings when I was 8. I was spanked with large sticks when I was 4-5 very often and occasionally after that. I was spanked every day from when I was 4 until I was 9 either with a hand or a stick either for my teachers or at home. When I had to pull my pants down and get spanked on my bare butt. I believe that it was the moment that triggered the involuntary sexual experiences. When I engage in this, I usually have flashbacks to that event. I have tried to get rid of those desires and prayed about it and God allowed me to have them. He did not get rid of them for a very good reason, so that I would not be judgmental of others and I would not call something a sin that was not found in the Bible to be a sin. When someone cuts themselves, we fail to understand that they carry deep emotional pain inside and we fail to reach out to them. Instead we gossip and look down on them. These types of things are done for a reason and we need to be more understanding of people no matter what they do, there is a reason they do it. We need to treat them with love and kindness. Pray for them and be gentle with them. Some people smoke and we call it a sin or we question their Christianity because of it. There is nothing in the Bible that says that smoking is a sin. People have a right to engage in things and do what they like as long as it does not violate the Bible and they are not hurting other people by it. Some people may be withdrawn and no one reaches out to them. That person may have been abused and yet faces further abuse by the bullying and rejection they face. We all have our differences. Love people for their differences rather than rejecting them. Bear the differences of others even if their differences are not your cup of tea. Be kind to one another. It is ok to be different. No 2 people are the same. If we see someone in sin, pray for them, love them and gently address their sin by showing them their sin in the Bible. Understand that they may be struggling with that. We all struggle with sin of one form or another in our lives. Treat others the way you want to be treated. Rodney Calmes Sent from Catch Notes for Android https://catch.com

Self Harm Is Not Just The Physical But It Is The Appearance Of The Pain A Person Carries Inside

We struggle with harming ourselves so to try to stop, we try to get rid of the things we use to harm ourselves with. By doing that, we just put a bandaid on our problem. We did not fix it. When we hurt ourselves, it is not just physical. The physical is just an outside appearance. Our pain lies deep inside. We feel worthless. We feel that we deserve it. We feel that we are nobody. These are lies that we believe about ourselves. Others may have treated us in a way to make us feel that way about ourselves. We have so much pain inside and our scars show it. People see our scars and instead of helping us, they scoff at us and gossip about us. They further hurt us when we need their help the most. We had no one else to turn to. So many judge us but no one comes to our side. God sees your pain and only He can help. We must accept Jesus Christ as our Lord and Savior and accept the sacrifice He has made on the cross for us. Only God can free us and restore us. We must get to our roots and even though it is painful, we must vent those to God. We need to see ourselves how God sees us. Jesus paid a precious price for us and that makes us very valuable to Him. God loves us even if no one else does. God never created us to be hurt but He created us to be loved. We get hurt because of man's sin, but Jesus died for it all. If you know someone who harms themselves, come along side them, pray for them and love them. Your act of kindness can change their lives forever. They need your love the most. Rodney Calmes Sent from Catch Notes for Android https://catch.com

Lies Versus Truth

Lies Versus Truth

1. You were told that you were worthless. Jesus considers you valuable even to pay His very own life for you on a cross.

2. You were told that you would never amount to anything. God can use you to accomplish great things. Look at Apostle Paul who murdered Christians before coming to know Christ. God used Paul in mighty ways, He can use you too.

3. You were told that you were stupid and dumb. God gave you the wisdom He desired you to have and that is sufficient for the work God will use you for.

4. You were told that you were a nobody or were treated that way. God created you in His image. That makes you very special to God.

5. You were told that you are dirt and were treated that way. In Genesis, God saw that He created you and said that you were good.

6. You were told that you don't mean anything. You were fearfully and wonderfully made by God. See Psalm 139. You mean a lot to God.

7. You were told that nothing good can come from you or that you don't matter or you may have been told that the world is better off without you. You have influenced many lives. How many people would have no one if they did not have you? What if your one act of kindness changed someone's life forever? Your love and kindness towards others will change many lives and will have a significant effect on the world.

8. You were told that no one could love you. God loves you even to give His only Son for you. Nothing can separate you from God's love. God created you to be loved. Those who do not love you have sinned against God.

9. You were told that there was something wrong with you. God created you to be unique and different. No 2 people are the same. God created your emotions and He created your personality. You have nothing to be ashamed of for how God created you to be. There is nothing wrong with you as a person. The only thing that creates problems is sin. Repent of any known sin and accept Jesus as you Lord and Savior and through the Holy Spirit of God, you are a new creation.

10. You were told that you will never accomplish anything good. Your faith in God and your love, kindness and compassion toward others has already accomplished much good whether you have seen it or not.

11. You were mistreated. Those who mistreated you has also mistreated God. What you have done to others you have done to God. See Matt. 25:31-46 I will hope and pray that you will be encouraged by this post. I love you all.

Rodney Calmes

Warning: Do Not Hate Those Who Are Different!

Warning: Do Not Hate Those Who Are Different!

There are people out there who may like something that maybe no one else would like. If that person does not violate the Bible and does not hurt someone else, let that person embrace what they like. Do not ridicule them. They have a right to like that even if you don't. No one has any right to ridicule someone for their differences.

If the Bible calls something a sin then in a loving and gentle way, show them the scriptures. Pray for them. If you cannot find it in the Bible that says it is a sin, leave them alone and let them do what they like. Hating someone because they are different is wrong. If a person is in sin, we should hate the sin and not the person.

Rodney Calmes

Accept The Differences Of Others, None Of Us Are The Same. Be Yourself

Accept The Differences Of Others, None Of Us Are The Same. Be Yourself

We all have things that we like and we all have things that we dislike. Embrace in the things that you like as long as you are not hurting anyone and it does not go against God's commands in the Bible. If you like to swing off the chandeliers, embrace that as long as they are your chandeliers. If you like to climb trees, do it. If you like to play with kids toys, do it. There is nothing wrong with any of these things. You don't have to try to be like everyone else, be yourself.

There are things that I like that are different than what other people my age like. I like to watch the classic Bugs Bunny Road Runner Show, I like 70's music, I like Ford Gran Torinos. I like to hunt deer, but whether or not I get one, I could care less even though other hunters are competitive, I am not. I like to make chocolate chip cookies even when other guys do not get into that. I like to enjoy nature. I like to fish even if I do not catch anything.

I am a very sensitive person who cries easily, especially when I know that someone else is hurting when most guys are not like that. I like helping people even though a lot of people could care less. I am a Christian.

You all have a right to be who you are without being judged. If you do something that the Bible tells you not to, you need to change that. If you are hurting other people, that needs to change. If you are not violating the Bible and are not hurting others, enjoy what you like and be yourself. Accept the differences of others and love them for who they are. If they violate the Bible, gently restore them with love. Love the person no matter what they like or dislike no matter how different it is.
Rodney Calmes